I blink and suddenly here we are, mid-June. I've been slowly whittling away the pounds in between all of the teething and crawling going on around here. Now I'm sitting at 263. I've happily chucked another four pounds into the not-gaining-this-back bucket. These pushups are definitely not getting any easier, but maybe I'll get some killer arms out of the deal?
The first several months of Frank's life, I viewed my body in a more utilitarian way. It's function? Sustain baby. I was a walking, emotional, (leaking..), post-partum blob on legs. My body is FINALLY starting to regain shape. My curves are returning along with a healthy dose of confidence, and I feel more and more like a human being every day (and much less like that blob). That pre-pregnancy number is finally within grasp. Oh, and, I finally did it. I bit the bullet and bought a bigger pair of jeans and I haven't looked back.
My photography is still headed in the right direction, as my return-to-school-semester looms overhead. As much as I'm dreading the logistics of child care, applying for child care grants, scheduling pick-ups and drop-offs, homework during nap time... the anticipation and excitement are slowly building for being back in a classroom setting. A lot of good things are coming this fall and I cannot wait to share them. Not only will I knocking out a semester worth of classes (let's just beat this dead horse, shall we?), but my best friend is getting married in October and I'll be maid of honor/photographer at said wedding, Frank's epic first birthday party will come in November, and don't even get me started on the holiday season. I'm trying to be patient (you know, since it's still only June), but I am so ready to start a few wonderful and beautiful traditions with my sweet boy. Did I mention he's crawling?!
In other news, baby sister graduated high school. Besides the immense pride, all I feel is old, old, old.
I have commitment issues.
Occasionally, I try to make commitments to this blog. For example, I'm going to take, and post, a new photo with a predetermined theme each day this month. I'm going to update with my weekly/monthly weight loss progress regularly. I'm going to graduate with my shiny science degree, and then have a baby.
Welp. That didn't quite pan out as I'd planned. Life happens, and this month has been full of it (life happenings, and well, poop).
I have, however, managed to keep some very important commitments. I am very committed, and happily married, to my Mountain Man. I've also kept my commitments as Frank's mommy, and to the rest of the critters who share our living space. I've kept my commitment to feeling better about myself, and have completed my running plan! WOOHOO! Who has two thumbs and can complete a solid 20-minute run, sans puking? This girl. Now it's time to work that up to a solid 30, then see about fitting three miles into that half hour (color run, here I come!).
My weight has been steady, sitting around at 267. No major gains, and no losses. But hey, that's alright. I'm making progress in other ways that some number cannot measure. Frankly, the scale can go screw itself. Speaking of weight loss, and my body (and my body image issues that I've carried around with me my entire life), I have been looking at myself in all wrong ways. (WOAH. I know what you're all thinking, who would do such a thing?) I have approached this weight loss with the wrong attitude. I even said that I would not, under any circumstances, purchase a bigger pair of jeans. Why would I put that ridiculous restraint on myself? My body has changed. I had a baby for crying out loud. It's time I backed into this from another angle. It's time to start dressing my body for how it is right now, this very second, and loving my body for how it is right now. I've always had this mentality of, "I will love myself more if I could just lose [insert number] more pounds. Then I will really be beautiful."
If I heard any of this bull come out of my friends' collective mouths, I'd slap 'em. Not really, guys. But, isn't it time that I start holding myself to these standards, instead of the ones set by society?
I've been wanting to take this shot (or a similar one) for a while. Now that Frankie is sitting up on his own, I was finally able to! This is more of a rough draft, but it's just about all of the sitting still he would tolerate. He was more focused on eating the bears.
1/320, 3.5, ISO 400
I played blog hookie yesterday. Besides, the topic was "in your house," and you've all seen a decent chunk of the inside of my house in this blog already. In fact, this picture of Frankie is in my house.
I spent yesterday's morning grocery shopping, and yesterday's afternoon running around taking photographs of eight prom-goers. I've been busy uploading and editing away, so I missed yesterday's "in your bag" blog photo update (I know!). In lieu of today's "in your yard" photo, these are my favorites from yesterday. Oh, and did I mention one of these attendees is my favorite (only) little sister? All of that cool you see in her, she definitely gets from me.
